Messages We Send

We cannot help how other people interpret the things we say, but we should think carefully about the message we can be unintentionally sending by what we do say.  During seasons of political campaigning and the recent Voice Referendum in Australia, these unintended messages can negatively influence people.  For instance, when supporters of the Voice urged voters to be "decent for once" or "show kindness" or "be on the right side of history" the message is a moral judgement that those who are leaning towards voting "no" are usually unsatisfactory, unkind and entrenched in being wrong.  On the flip side, if we say the reason for voting "no" is that people "need to get a job" it is an unfounded accusation of laziness or freeloading.  Without knowing it, things we say can be offensive and provide justification for us and our point of view to be rejected.  In trying to build a bridge to bring people together, we can erect a wall to divide.

Just this morning I was given an illustration of how close this hits to home.  It was brought to my attention that I demonstrate the characteristics of being a "food snob" by my offhand comments.  Somehow my way of sharing personal preferences of food and drink make (at least one person in my household!) feel like because their preferences are different, it is a condemnation of them personally.  Now I do not want this ever to be the case.  I believe it is wrong for me to make a moral judgment of someone who prefers drinking skim milk over full cream.  I don't want to accidently send the message that I am against people who have embraced a vegetarian diet or who eat meat with every meal.  As the LORD uses others to bring our own blind spots and messages we convey through our careless words, we ought to double our efforts to speak plain truth in a loving, edifying way--and give space for differences of opinion.

If by expressing our views concerning politics or food send messages that makes others feel negatively judged or condemned, it follows we can do the same concerning our views of Jesus Christ, the Bible and the church.  It is likely many times with religious fervour we have turned people off from the Gospel or Christians because of a judgmental or personally condemning message that (unknown to us) came through our words loud and clear.  Thus we do well to carefully examine our motivation behind the words we use and how we say them, considering the message we send and how it could be received by our hearers.  It is possible people may read into what we say, make incorrect assumptions or be influenced more by their own feelings and bias than our words, but let us not be guilty of attacking, belittling, embarrassing or hating others by the unintended messages we send.