Deadbeat No More (by God's grace)!

Back in the '90's, the unfortunate term "deadbeat dads" came into vogue to define dads who didn't rise to the subjective expectation of what a dad should be.  Dads who refused to pay child support, denied they even had a child, or shirked their responsibility to raise their children in the eyes of their ex-wives, girlfriends, or the courts, were labeled as such.  Now I read the politically-correct revised term is "deadbeat parent."  Whether it is dad or mum who chooses to neglect the God-given privilege and responsibility to raise their children, the kids are the biggest losers.

I have lately been thinking about my responsibility to disciple my own children, striving to raise them in the nurture and admonition of the LORD.  Kids need more than food, water, love, and affirmation from their parents; they need much more than quality time, holidays, recreation, schooling, sport, social interaction, and a bed to sleep in.  Jesus said that man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.  Because this is true for all people, it is true for kids as well.  Job proclaims the indispensable nature and necessity of God's Word in Job 23:12:  "I have not departed from the commandment of His lips; I have treasured the words of His mouth more than my necessary food."  In the ongoing battle in courthouses throughout the United States, the 10 Commandments are being removed off the walls while "deadbeat parents" are cited and fined for not providing money for their children's welfare.  That is ironic, seeing that the Word of God is more important and necessary to both body and soul than food or water! 

Amos 8:11 is a scripture we see fulfilled in our day.  "Behold, the days are coming," says the Lord GOD, "that I will send a famine on the land, not a famine of bread, nor a thirst for water, but of hearing the words of the LORD."  The brutal irony is not that God's Word is neglected by unbelievers, but by professing believers.  It is not only certain churches where this famine is rife:  it is a blight in the homes of solid Christian families.  I speak candidly when I say I was once a "deadbeat dad" spiritually.  There have been days in our home when we did not open the Word of God and read it together with discussion and explanation.  Years ago, even as a pastor, I committed the training and discipleship of my young children to Sunday School teachers.  I had shirked God's command to make disciples in my own house, a grave sin.

I am thankful that God opened my eyes to see what I loser I was, spending most of my time discipling other people's children and not making it a priority to train my own.  Our family has made many changes in our home over the years, but the best has been a commitment to read the Bible together every day.  There is always room for improvement.  Don't get me wrong:  you do well if you feed your children, provide for their physical needs, and spend time with them.  1 Timothy 5:8 reads, "But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."  But the real question is this:  Dads, what are you providing for the spiritual nourishment and admonition of your wife and children?  Mums, how are you using God's Word to train your children in the way they should go according to God's will?  Grandparents are not off the hook either!  Titus 2 contains a great list of exhortations to believers of all ages summed up with, "Speak these things, exhort, and rebuke with all authority. Let no one despise you." (Titus 2:15)

As long as a man remains on earth by God's grace, it's never too late for God to transform a willing person through the power of the Holy Spirit.  Because God changes the hearts and minds of people, it is never too late to change the way we do things.  Shedding the spiritual deadbeat moniker starts with agreement with God, confession of our neglect as sin, and taking steps - even radical ones - to disciple our own children to following Jesus Christ. Men, take charge of the family God has committed to you.  God has called parents to teach and train their children.  He has given us the power through the Spirit, and the discernment and wisdom of God to address the deepest needs of our children:  to know God, to love Him, and to love one another as Jesus has loved us.