While studying the book of Ruth, I was struck with an interaction between Naomi and her daughter-in-law Ruth. As they travelled to Bethlehem, Naomi urged both of her widowed daughters-in-law to return to their mothers houses, to go back to their own people and gods. Orpah eventually did so, but Ruth clung to Naomi and professed her unwavering commitment to Naomi. She was willing to leave behind the hope of remarriage and children to live where Naomi lived, and chose to embrace a new identity by faith in the God of Israel.
Ruth 1:18 described Naomi's response: "When she
saw that she was determined to go with her, she stopped speaking to her." Naomi had been very forthright and insistent returning to Moab was in Ruth's best interest, but Ruth was of another mind. When Naomi saw Ruth's mind was made up, that her heels were dug in and she would not be swayed, Naomi dropped the subject. The verse does not mean Naomi gave Ruth the silent treatment and refused to converse because her advice had been rejected. The following chapters contain much conversation between the two, so it is clear they remained on speaking terms.
The decision of Naomi to strongly make her case and to drop the subject when it was clear she and Ruth disagreed is a good example for Christians to observe--especially when disagreements arise about personal or controversial subjects. God has given everyone unique personalities, perspectives, interests and convictions, and with our diversity brings differences. It is a tragedy when differences of opinion, emphasis or practice become divisive because people are unwilling to drop a subject after it becomes clear people are not in agreement. In such cases it is good to be reminded of all we share in common by faith in Jesus Christ who has united us with the Holy Spirit as one to follow, serve and glory Christ together.
After Naomi repeatedly urged Ruth to depart, Ruth told her not to say anything further on the subject. Naomi showed wisdom by listening to her daughter-in-law even as she wanted Ruth to listen and consider her advice. Naomi was willing to agree to disagree on the matter of their opinions where Ruth should go and live, and Christians ought to extend grace to others as well. It is reasonable those God has given His word and Spirit can judge among themselves, have a different views, and remain united in the love of Jesus Christ. Since coming to Christ, haven't your views been refined over time? God who gives discernment for us to walk wisely can instruct and refine others as well.
Knowing only God can change hearts and minds, even when we are convinced we are in the right we need not continue to hammer away at those who have different or contrary views. Paul affirmed this freedom concerning convictions in Romans 14:5: "One
person esteems one day above another; another esteems every day
alike. Let each be fully convinced in his own mind." While Paul put forth strong arguments to support his doctrine and manner of life, he did not imagine it was his responsibility to change people's minds because God is able to do the impossible. He said in Philippians 3:15, "Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind; and if in
anything you think otherwise, God will reveal even this to you."
Humans are inclined to be divided by differences and become divisive. We prefer to pressure others to change than God using a person we do not agree with as being His instrument to change us. We would rather leave or have someone leave us than trusting and submitting to God by leaving the convincing of others to God and continuing in fellowship with them. If we say we love God, then we ought to love one another and value the unity and oneness we share by faith in Jesus.
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