Humans have a tendency to take things personally. This leaning impacts our judgments and how we connect causes and effects with people. For instance, when my child misbehaves in a public setting I might feel embarrassment or that his conduct reflects poorly upon me as a parent. Since I take personally the responses of my child to discipline or am sensitive to the opinions of others, when I notice other people's kids misbehaving or throwing a tantrum what might I do? Without thinking I put the same burden on other children as an honest reflection of their parents. Our personal investment causes us to take things personally, good and bad. Situations which have little or no bearing on us we have an ability to turn personal and speak presumptuously.
In the last couple weeks I heard of cases of a well-known Christian author and music writer who have publicly announced they have either left the Christian faith or are "losing" faith. These sorts of stories are often circulated on websites and social media, and observing the response of readers has been interesting. The vast amount of responses I have seen concerning the musician and song writer of a popular church have "made it personal," attributing the song writer's lost faith to the alleged watering-down of the scripture in teaching at the church he attends. Perhaps people who are intimately acquainted with the church feel entitled to offer this opinion. But from the outside it is nothing more than seeing bad behaviour in a child and blaming the parents for lack of discipline. Could there be a connection? Possibly. At the same time among my online acquaintances there was no outcry against the church of the famous author who is now without faith: he alone was the primary focus.
We must be very careful to avoid rushing to judgment in these matters, and even better not to judge at all. If these ministers of God can drift from Him to a place of doubting, we who think we stand should take heed lest we fall. Since only God fully knows the hearts of men, we risk wading into the error of speaking presumptuously concerning straying brothers or sisters. Should we blame others for their own personal wrestling, doubts, and unbelief? Can we blame parents, pastors, or church body for wayward children who do what is right in their own eyes? That is like blaming a parent for their adult son's STI who moved away from home years ago. On the flip side there are many godly young people whose parents are totally hostile and opposed to the things of God: should we credit heathen parents for their child's desire and love for God? Give credit to where credit is due, and only God is worthy. To use the behaviour of children to discredit parents or the foibles of parents to slander their children is folly because each stand before the righteous God and Judge.
This morning I read the first chapter of Jonah and I find the provision, grace, and salvation of God towards this wayward prophet most encouraging. The word of the LORD came to Jonah, but Jonah went his own way: down to Joppa, down into the ship, and finally down into the belly of the great fish God had prepared. Parents have been guilty of writing off their own children for their shameful conduct, but God didn't disown Jonah. In fact, God determined to use Jonah to save the men on the ship, to deliver the wicked Ninevites from destruction, and to provide a sign to point to Jesus Christ as God and Saviour. Matthew 12:38-41 reads, "Then some of the scribes and Pharisees answered, saying, "Teacher,
we want to see a sign from You." 39 But He answered and said to them, "An evil
and adulterous generation seeks after a sign, and no sign will be given to it
except the sign of the prophet Jonah. 40 For as Jonah was three days and three
nights in the belly of the great fish, so will the Son of Man be three days and
three nights in the heart of the earth.41 The men of Nineveh will rise up in the
judgment with this generation and condemn it, because they repented at the
preaching of Jonah; and indeed a greater than Jonah is here."
God didn't distance Himself from Jonah as if he reflected poorly upon His lordship. Jonah was not an effective preacher because of years of study or cross-cultural missionary training but by the grace of God which was a sign that pointed to Jesus Christ the Saviour. Jonah didn't head to Joppa because of bad parenting, nor did he determine to avoid Nineveh because his synagogue watered-down doctrine. It's true parents make mistakes and the Word of God is not always handled honestly in pulpits, but the point of this post is this: let us avoid speaking presumptuously about why the author of a book sold in Christian bookshops walked away from the faith or a worship pastor gives place to doubt. Only God knows exactly what is at work behind the scenes and in their hearts and ours. Instead of piling on or stoking flames of gossip we ought to show compassion and pray for those who are deceived, lost, or erring. We ought to remember Jonah and how God used Him as a sign to unbelievers so people would believe and come to salvation through Jesus Christ. Should people walk away from Christ it is easy to take it personally, but we don't have to: they have turned from Christ, not us.
