Confessions of an ex-Pharisee

No one is born a Christian, but all are born with a degree of Pharisee in them.  Pharisees were the Jewish religious leaders who upheld the traditional interpretations of the Law of Moses in the time of Christ.  They believed strict adherence to their traditions was necessary to be acceptable in God's sight.  In the sermon I delivered Sunday (5/1/11) at Calvary Chapel Sydney, one of the themes touched upon was the danger of legalism.  Legalism can be defined as when people impose their own convictions upon another in addition to faith in Christ..  Luke 18:9 explains the purpose of a parable Christ told:  "...He spoke this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others."  When a man trusts in his own righteousness to commend him before God, the end result is he despises others.  The problem is, there are none who are righteous (Ps. 14:2-3) except Jesus Christ.  We might see ourselves as relatively righteous, but that is like a crack-cocaine dealer saying he's not quite as bad as a heroin dealer because smoking drugs isn't as bad as shooting them.  All have sinned and fallen short of God's perfection.

Allow me to quote what I could describe as an "anti-Pharisaical rant" by Jesus Christ in Matthew 23:23-29:  "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith. These you ought to have done, without leaving the others undone. ²⁴ Blind guides, who strain out a gnat and swallow a camel! ²⁵ Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you cleanse the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of extortion and self-indulgence. ²⁶ Blind Pharisee, first cleanse the inside of the cup and dish, that the outside of them may be clean also. ²⁷ Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs which indeed appear beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men's bones and all uncleanness. ²⁸ Even so you also outwardly appear righteous to men, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness."

Let me freely confess that for too many of my younger days (to my shame!) I was a Pharisee.  Raised in church, filled with knowledge, relatively righteous in conduct and speech, being right was paramount.  My life appeared very clean but my heart harboured disrespect and disgust for those who disagreed with the "right" way:  my way, of course!  I would strain a single word out of place from a sermon and stand in judgment, yet miss the whole point of what was being said.  I was a blind guide, a whitewashed tomb filled with the stench of death.  Funny thing is, at the time I had no idea!  As I fumbled through high school, I didn't drink, cuss, or sleep around.  I didn't stash dirty magazines and respected the curfew set by my parents.  I received high marks at school and was responsible.  But my life was dictated often by what I didn't do, not by what I did for God.  I read the Bible but was more concerned about finishing chapters than putting into practice a single verse I read.  As I look back I can't believe how blind I was.  And with that blindness how much more miraculous that God brought me out of that pit I dug for myself!

I was asked a very thought provoking question following the sermon:  how did I escape from the scourge of legalism?  Only by the grace of God:  there can be no other answer.  It was not through any labour on my part, but the goodness, faithfulness, love, and persistence of God to convict my heart of sin.  Pharisees love to remain under the Law and have the steps laid out perfectly.  But the Holy Spirit isn't a dictator:  He leads us.  The path of deliverance for one person will vary greatly, yet with one common denominator:  the love, grace, mercy, forgiveness, and power of Jesus Christ.  No one can be delivered from being a Pharisee without Jesus!  Think about how many ways a person can be broken out of prison!  Paul and Silas were in a prison and an earthquake flung open the doors and the chains fell off.  Peter was lying between Roman guards when an angel kicked him and told Peter to stand up and follow him.  Joseph started a day as a prisoner and ended the day a free man, second in command of the nation of Egypt after interpreting Pharaoh's dream!

The path of brokenness for sin was the way of my deliverance.  Years of struggle with a particular sin led to me to the end of myself.  For a long time I had trusted in myself and despised others:  at the moment when I fell to my knees at the cross, I despised myself and trusted God.  I was not only filled with a love for God but for others.  It was like the scales fell from my eyes and I saw myself in my wretched, helpless condition.  No one needs to be taught to esteem themselves, for Ephesians 5:29 states, "For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church."  Our pride can disguise our love of self and sin in countless ways.  The battle between my sinful flesh and the Holy Spirit was over when I yielded to God's truth and cried with many tears, "You were right all along, God - I have been wrong!  Please forgive me!"

The night which enveloped me for a long season gave way immediately to the brightest of days, a season of light which continues until now.  The whitewashed Pharisee was dead:  the tomb stirred with new life!  Instead of the stench of rotten flesh rose the aroma of Christ, sweeter than precious perfume.  Like when Lazarus rose from the dead in obedience to the call of Christ, God raised me up by His grace.  Done were the days of comparing myself to others, judging, and feeling pressure to conform for acceptance.  By the grace of God I am who I am.  Sin has no lasting grip on me anymore, for death has been swallowed up in the victory purchased with the blood of Jesus.  Am I perfect?  No.  But my Savior is, and has filled me with the Holy Spirit.  Instead of being ruled by the letter of the Law, I am led by the Spirit who inspired it.

He is a wise man who sees himself as God does.  My identity no longer comes from what I do or don't do, but from my Saviour who loves me, saved me, and transformed me.  I am a great sinner, but Jesus is a greater Saviour!