Training Up Children

"Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."

Proverbs 22:6

When I was an apprentice, a big part of my training was following the example set by my foreman concerning how he wanted work done.  Over many years I spread my time between several different foremen and they all had different standards and expectations.  My conduct was a mix between standards of quality established in the classroom as well as in the field on the job among my peers.  I was required to switch gears quickly between tasks and multiple job sites, remembering how particular bosses wanted duct wrapped, chillers covered with rubber, or how exposed metalwork should be completed.  I benefited from working under and receiving training from journeyman who had different specialities.

Solomon exhorted parents to train up children in the right way applying knowledge of God's wisdom and truth.  Being a proverb, however, this is not an absolute guarantee that godly parenting always results in godly children through adulthood.  This is a general principle not a promise.  God is the perfect Father, yet His people went astray in unbelief.  There are many people who were raised by godly parents who went their own way, and children raised in homes without the knowledge of God later became His faithful servants.  Many parents have heaped guilt and condemnation upon themselves because they blamed their poor parenting for their child's rebellious choices.  Others imagine they must have done a great job of parenting because their kids are well-behaved with polite manners.  But the maxim rings true:  children trained to obey and honour obey God in their youth will be most likely to continue walking in God's ways through adulthood.

If we desire to train up children to live the right way, it is important as parents we set a godly example.  Childhood provides many teachable moments, opportunities to practically apply scripture, and hands-on experiences we can utilise to encourage, teach, and correct.  A father who loves his son will discipline him when necessary in an appropriate and loving manner as the situation and the leading of the Holy Spirit dictate.  As parents it is imperative we remain humble and teachable during the process of this training, for God uses children to instruct parents in countless ways.  How many times in teaching my children has God taught me and revealed my need to change!  Ultimately both parents and children will stand before God and give account for their actions:  parents will not be condemned for stubborn or wayward children, and children will not be given a free pass to disobey because their parents were slack.

Since I want my children to go the right way, I must be disciplined and responsible to walk in the right way myself.  It is hypocrisy for me to refuse to do myself what I expect of my kids.  Becoming angry about their disobedience or laziness could very well be self-inflicted, for it may be I have been slack to communicate, instruct, discipline, or adequately model a standard which meets my expectations.  Child rearing is a means God uses to train parents and guardians of children to look to Jesus for strength and wisdom, to step up in obedience to Him, and to press on in personal sanctification.  Should my children follow Jesus through adulthood, it is not because I have "done something right" but because God is gracious and good, worthy of being followed forever.