S21 - Tuol Sleng

Below are excerpts from a journal entry I wrote the evening after touring the notorious S21 in Phnom Penh, a school the Khmer Rouge turned into a facility of torture and imprisonment.

Cambodia:  a nation which still lies under the shadow of brutal, systematic torture and murder of her own children.  As I saw hundreds of faces photographed during their imprisonment in S21, one cannot help but be haunted by their vacant, expressionless, almost soulless faces.  The only thing is, their souls were still there.  Their eyes had beheld tortures no created being should see or imagine.  They were unfeeling eyes, detached.  Their ears had heard the screams of the tortured and the dying.  The mind had ample time to play, making every waking moment an exercise in psychological torture and oppression.  When it was inevitably your turn - when it was happening to you - it made even less sense.  Tears were punishable by more pain.

What of the killing fields?  What of the macabre keepsakes of torture, the photographs, the artistic renderings?  Is there a place in this world for them?  Should we instead build picturesque pools for reflection, wiping away the hideous memories?  What of the piles of bones, skulls, and stories recounted in S21?  Cambodia has done well to encapsulate and preserve the incredible brutality of the regime.  The horror, raving madness, carnage and loss should be remembered in graphic terms.  No sanitised art, lilting song, or poetry could be this compelling:  raw, graphic, hell.

Sin constructs hell in the human heart, a raging monster revealed in mad violence.  The killing fields cannot be undone, nor should they be memorialised with songs, smiles, and the release of doves.  Weeping is the only appropriate response.  And if you cannot weep it begs the question:  why not?  These deaths count for something good when we say with conviction, never again!  No more will there be hurt, fear, and killing within our walls - only healing, peace, and joy through Jesus Christ.  We will never forget Pol Pot was a wicked man, but he had a lot of help to initiate and pursue his heinous, demonic, and ruthless ideologies.  There seems to be no shortage of men on earth to willingly do the devil's work:  to steal, kill, and destroy.

There will always be a Pol Pot until Christ binds and throws him into hell.  His name is Satan.  Instead of acquiescing, I will stand and fight against him in the powerful name and authority of Jesus Christ.  He has done worse than any man, though he brutally uses all men who wander from God.  In Christ alone our hope is found and rests!

No Looking Back

"And truly if they had called to mind that country from which they had come out, they would have had opportunity to return. ¹⁶ But now they desire a better, that is, a heavenly country. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them."

Hebrews 11:15-16

Abraham was a man God called out of his own country as he walked by faith, not by sight.  He had no problems with giving Lot first choice of the land.  While Lot lifted and fixed his eyes upon the lush greenery towards Sodom, Abraham only looked to God for security, provision, and life.  Abraham did not continually remind himself of the country God brought him out of.  Should he have done so, the writer of Hebrews tells us he would have had opportunity to return.  But Abraham desired more than land:  he longed for the presence of God in a heavenly country,

As I was growing up, one of the songs I remember often sung at baptisms goes, "I have decided to follow Jesus. No turning back, no turning back."  The writer of Hebrews in the next chapter clearly states where our eyes ought to be focused.  Hebrews 12:1-2 reads, "Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, ² looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."  I am typically mindful of whatever I set before my eyes.  If my eyes are watching a football game, my mind is also involved in thinking about it.  Where the eyes go, the mind follows.  It is for this reason we are to lay aside every hindrance, repent of all sin, and then look to Christ alone as our example and King.

Throughout scripture the correlation between eyes and the mind is clear.  Should Abraham have looked back with longing to his home city, it showed some of his heart remained there.  When Lot and his family escaped from Sodom, they were told not to look back upon the destruction of the city.  Genesis 19:26 tells us, "But his wife looked back behind him, and she became a pillar of salt."  Looking back cost Lot's wife her life.  Jesus says in Luke 9:62, "No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God."  A man who looks back cannot plow straight.  His eyes are to be focused straight ahead, on his present task.  God may not have called you out of your country, but He has certainly called you out of your old life.  If we find ourselves looking back to the old life with longing or deep regret we will not advance or mature in our walk with Christ.  That is why Paul wrote in Philippians 3:13-14, "Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, ¹⁴ I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."  Paul refused to allow past apparent successes or failures distract him from pressing forward in the call God had upon his life.

Instead of wallowing in thoughts of the past or becoming lost in the future, let us fix our eyes, minds, and hearts upon Jesus Christ.  If we will be fit for heaven, we must put our hand to the plow without looking back.  As the old song says, "Turn your eyes upon Jesus.  Look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace."

Back from Cambodia

Yesterday I returned to Sydney after a mission trip to Cambodia.  It was an incredible blessing and an unforgettable experience.  In many ways I am still decompressing as I sort through the trip in my mind as I look through the pictures I took.  God provided bountifully and protected the entire team.  Though I am a foreigner in Australia, I do not always feel like one.  In Cambodia, I almost always felt like a foreigner!  From the moment pastor Hung drove our team from the airport, it was like being in another world.  The variety of sights and smells are more than I could possibly do justice through recounting.  I have returned from Cambodia not only rich in experiences, but also with new friendships with members of our team, translators, and missionaries who live in Cambodia.

People are people wherever you go.  But the biggest difference I noticed from countries I have lived in and Cambodia is how much effort is required for survival.  The American and Australian cultures I am familiar with pursue comfort and convenience:  survival is largely assumed.  In Cambodia, this is not true.  Clean water, sanitation, and good nutrition is often not available.  In some of the remote villages we visited (maybe only 20 minutes off a paved road) the most basic medical attention might as well be 200 miles away.  Many of these people do not leave the village and even if they could, they could never pay with cash because they are farmers who live off the rice they grow.  The magnitude of the physical and spiritual needs is truly beyond comprehension.  Praise be to God that we were able to meet some of those needs! 

Our Aussie team joined with small teams from the States and Mexico providing basic medical exams and medicine, dental care, and reading glasses.  But more important than the care provided by our trained doctors and dentist was the spiritual care provided through the Gospel.  To pull out rotting teeth and supply medicine is good, but it is only a temporary fix.  The Gospel of Jesus Christ removes the rot from a human heart and provides eternal salvation by grace through faith.  It was amazing to see people drinking in the words of life, tasting and seeing that God is real and good. 

I have included some pictures of four villages we visited.  More to come!

10 Days in Cambodia

In our family, we love board games.  Playing a game together is one of our first choices on a family night.  One of the games in our closet is called "10 Days in Asia," a favourite of Laura.  Players can walk or use a airplane or train to connect their international destinations.  Being a person who loves to organise things, Laura plays the game exceptionally well.  Cambodia is one of the countries in the game, and a country God-willing I will visit on a 10 day trip that begins tomorrow.

Cambodia is historically a country that has endured much suffering at the hands of its leadership.  During the years spanning 1975 to 1979, nearly two million people were killed at the command of Pol Pot of the Khmer Rouge.  It was a tragedy of such immensity the wounds have only begun to heal.  The hurt is so profound that even time can hardly numb the pain:  only God has the power to redeem such misery.  Wherever the Gospel goes, love, hope, and joy with salvation go as well.  How fitting that I would visit Cambodia just after Christmas, a time set apart to celebrate Christ's coming to earth as a divine Saviour.  As the new year approaches, it is only Jesus who has the power to make all things new.

Please pray for our group and the people of Cambodia!  Upon my return I hope to share some pictures and testify of God's faithfulness.