The Vicious Cycle of Self

Everyone living has experienced hurt and sorrow.  There is a malevolent catharsis in recounting times in our past when our hearts were broken.  Feeling sorry for ourselves is one way of coping, but it is a deceptive, destructive path.  In the end we are left lower than before, choking back the vomit of shame, guilt, resentment, and bitterness. Acknowledgement of our pain and hurt is the first step to healing, and genuine healing of the soul is found only in Jesus Christ.  Because we have all been hurt, we all face the temptation of dwelling upon the wrongs done to us rather than the One who took my wrongs upon Himself.

During my life I have been hurt in many ways.  I have suffered from a broken heart many times.  I have been lied to, deceived, misjudged, ridiculed, and ignored.  I face the very real temptation to look upon hurtful moments and seasons in my life and brood over them.  When I try to logically make sense out of some things that have happened in my life decades ago, I am still at a loss to explain them.  I am no closer to definite conclusions on why God allowed things to happen.  The downward spiral into the murky darkness of self pity beckons, but I have already been down there.  It was a rotten, hopeless place to be.  It was Jesus every time who pulled me out, and I never want to go back again.  Thankfully, I don't have to!

If you don't know Jesus Christ as LORD and Saviour, what I'm saying likely doesn't make a shred of sense.  Because I have repented and trusted on Christ, His life is now mine.  By faith I have become a new creation in Him.  I testify to you and the whole world that Jesus has healed my broken heart many times.  He has bound up my wounds, dried my tears, and replaced fear and worry with peace and joy.  He has turned my mourning into rejoicing.  What is the secret to avoid the vicious cycle of self?  When thoughts of how you have been hurt flood into your mind and heart, turn your attention instead to the hurt and suffering Christ endured for your sake.  When we are burdened with cares and a root of bitterness begins to grow and you can only wonder, "Why God?  Why would you let that happen to me?"  In that moment I need only consider why Jesus suffered and died for me:  it was a revelation of divine love.  Romans 5:8 says, "But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."  By the grace of God, He has changed the way I think.

I am not suggesting that we ignore, bury, or deny the fact we have been hurt.  To the contrary, we must bare our hurts to God, admitting exactly how we feel, casting our cares upon Jesus because He cares for us.  If someone has hurt me accidentally or with malice, I need to freely forgive them because Jesus has freely forgiven me.  In releasing others from our bitterness we are also freed!  It is a truly amazing transformation that occurs when I remove my focus from myself and the wrongs done to me and look with adoration upon Jesus Christ.  It is by His stripes I am healed!  We are able to overcome the vicious cycle of self through Christ, and none other.